The fireflies... froze..

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Since my last post and my spotting of the fireflies I have not seen a single one again. The temperatures have been about 55 F in the day maybe 60 tops - and at night 45-50. It's been cold. And although we were in need of rain, now we seem to be getting too much. You can't win with mother nature - she does her own thing.

I'm hoping when it warms up the fireflies will return but I have to admit, I'm worried.

The only good thing is the cool weather has slowed down the other bugs - one's I don't like, but I'm not sure if it's slowed them down or killed them off yet. We'll have to wait until it warms up again to see.

Thank you all from the bottom of my heart for your messages and encouragement about my upcoming surgery. I do have this heaviness lifted off of me now that I know there is another option other than suffering through more medication here and waiting for more referrals and years to get surgeries that will leave me just hoping for any improvement, which is unlikely. That was a bit like a fat man standing on my head, dancing around. Actually, it was a lot like that. It was miserable. 

Of course there is so much up in the air and still to do. When will it be? How does the Insurance work? How much will we have to pay? How do we get there, drive, camp, fly? Kevin says I'm supposed to leave all this to him. That's kind of hard to do but every time I find myself begin to worry about anything, how this works, or how big this surgery will actually be, I completely push it away, remind myself that things have fallen into place to this point and they will continue to. We spoke to the clinic yesterday and the scheduling lady said she'd call again Monday, but because they need to schedule three Doctors all at the same time for my surgery, it looks like the date will be the end of July, not the beginning like we hoped. I wish it was sooner, but I'm just glad I'm able to do it at all. 

Aside from the pain I can't wait to have this fatigue lifted. I know the recovery time for this surgery is big and I'm not going to feel better right away, but I'm so tired of feeling like I'm drugged all the time, when I'm not. It's like someone has turned off my switch. My body is just worn out from this. Never mind my heart and mind. We had to go to NY on Wed for a Doctor's appointment for Kevin at the VA and we didn't manage to get even half our errands done. He was tired from the drive and I couldn't even stand up anymore, I was hurting and I couldn't walk. My body just gives out on me which is a new experience for me.

So there continues to be a lot of lying down in my life and a lot of sleeping.

I managed to work on my deck garden on Monday. I've got 7 different kinds of peppers growing (multiples of each) three types of lettuce, rainbow chard, summer squash, zucchini, four types of tomatoes, a dozen different flowers, strawberries, and about 10 different herbs... So far.

In the main garden, things are quiet and slow. Aside from the raspberries, Kevin managed to get our first planting of corn in. But we have a dozen other things we haven't been able to plant. Kevin is sick with his allergies and I'm just not able to work at all in the big garden. So we'll do what we can and we'll just have to accept it as frustrating as that is for us.

Yesterday I regularly took the pain medication I do have. I don't take it very often because I don't like the side effects and I've never found it to help much. This morning I woke up and felt less pain than usual and it dawned on me that the day after I take pain medication I usually feel better than usual. Kevin's been telling me to just deal with the side effects and take the medication more routinely - so I took it again this morning even though I wasn't going to. After that I had 2 1/2 hours of feeling really good, and I got a lot done. I got some things cleaned up in the barn, all my chores, the dishes washed and kitchen cleaned up and I cleaned the birds. Normal things but I did them all while feeling capable instead of fighting myself. Then I got tired, but it was nice to have a bit of energy and not hurt too much while doing it.

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I took these pictures a few days ago, it's raining today and dark outside, but it's warmer than yesterday.  Tuesday was the last day we had any sunshine here and everyone enjoyed it.

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My Pygmy kids are really growing! Even little Puffin. Dahlia is such a great mom...

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Braveheart is nice and dirty again thanks to rolling in the dirt to help with the flies. It's no easy feat to keep a white sheep, or a white goat... white.

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Aurora is the most playful of all the kids - she loves climbing.

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The rocky part of the goat pasture is one of their favorite spots...

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It's lots of fun jumping from rock to rock...

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Wanna play?

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Max keeps an eye on them to make sure they aren't getting into too much trouble.

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Puffin stays close to her mom sometimes, but other times she gets really bold and goes off on her own or with the other goats. Yesterday I went up to put them to bed and it was pouring rain... I couldn't find Puffin or Aurora but Firefly was following her mama around.

Where did I find Puffin and Aurora?

In a tree.

There is a tree beside the barnyard fence that has a big hole in it that's off the ground but you can get to it by climbing the rocks. Those two little girls climbed up in there to keep dry. I wished so badly I had my camera, it was so adorable watching them come out of their tree house to go in the barn for the night.

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Sammy, bossy boy that he is with the other goats, loves the kids. All of them. He's really good with them and it's so sweet to watch.

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It was a beautiful day out in the sun.

Hard to remember what that feels like after days of gloomy skies and lots of rain.

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The goose families (we have two) spend most of the day in the yard now...

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Typically when I wake up (this is what it looks like here today - no sunshine) they are outside the bedroom window...

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The babies are all growing like weeds too! 

Dq asked on my Dandelion wine post, where do I find some of the recipes I make and share. For that recipe, you can find a few online. I looked at about 5 recipes, three online and two in old cookbooks. I buy old farming cook books and county fair cook books - they have some great recipes and very adaptable recipes. I chose to use a dandelion wine recipe from a small town (local to me) country fair fundraising cookbook. The recipe was a paragraph and left a lot to the imagination but I deciphered it and went with it. It's from the old timers around here and I figured if someone knows how to make dandelion wine, it's these people. The old generation almost completely gone around here lived in the bush and very simply... they were living off the land... and if there is one thing they liked it was wine and spirits... and they were not always easy to get having to travel by wagon to town, and they were costly to buy for people who's only source of income was their farm. We often wonder how Kevin's ancestors who lived here bought anything, they raised animals for themselves but rarely sold much of anything other than eggs, and one of them did a little mechanic work and farrier work, but really, they didn't bring in a lot of money. Most of the old timers around here lived with family - up the road from us on a now abandoned farm there lived 8 brothers, none of them ever married. You can only imagine the stories about those boys!

And on this farm, after Kevin's Great Grandfather pioneered this farm in the 1850's, six of their children left the farm, but 5 of them remained on this farm for their entire lives together without marrying... then after they all passed our farm was abandoned for 50 years until Kevin came along and then me and the herd.

It's amazing the things that can be done with the wild flowers and plants that are all around us. I often wonder who discovered some of these things, like who figured out dandelions taste a lot like honey and make a great wine?

I didn't expect to be writing on the 7th of June that we were building a fire in the wood stove and making hot chocolate, but that's pretty much what we've been doing.

It sure has been an interesting spring!


The kids are just too cute! I love seeing them jumping around on the rocks. Looks like they are having so much fun.

Sorry about your surgery getting pushed back to the end of the month. It seems like that's just what happens with medical appointments, although I'm sure you are well aware of that. I'm glad your medicine gives you a little relief so you can get some things done that you want to do. Hope you feel better!
Dreaming said…
I ALWAYS wonder about things like you mentioned - (dandelions). So much of what we eat or use for medicines, or make beverages from - who was the first brave soul to try it?!
You are a brave woman - all of that pain and suffering. I do hope the surgery all works out and that recovery is faster than predicted.
I am betting your fireflies are just sleeping it off and will be back when the weather warms. It sure has been a strange spring!
jaz@octoberfarm said…
it is so hard to not worry about everything that is ahead but at least now you know you have a good chance to find relief. i am sitting here watching the news and wondering if you are going to get hit by this tropical storm? we got one day of rain and that was it. they predicted so much more but it missed us. those rocks look like goat disneyland. i bet you could just watch them all day. i hope you get some good news soon!
Ian H said…
Hot chocolate is really good, when it's cold outside, or warm. Hang in there! there are lots of folks praying for you. Just remember there are lots of good folks out there, and you are one of them.
Lana88 said…
Burrr! Sounds cold. I think the baby goats are imagining they are mountain goats! Haha! That's funny about the old timer folks with a bunch of boys that never married. We have a few like that around here, a bunch of boys and a sister, and none ever married. It was a really sad day for them when they lost their Ma.

Glad the medicine helps you at least a little, and thank goodness for Kevin. Hang in there, your surgery will be here before long! And I know they will take wonderful care of you. I used to work in OR a few years ago, and we always treated every patient as if they were our own family members. You'll do just fine. I used to tell my patients that I would take back to surgery that... "you'll be just fine. You have a wonderful doctor. We are going to take care of you." And I'd squeeze their hand if it looked like they needed it.
It's great that you finally found a surgeon who seems to know what he is talking about and things are coming together. It only makes sense to do everything all at once, but finding doctors willing to work with each other is so hard. I'm glad for you that you finally managed it, I might even ask for his name one of these days.
Primitive Stars said…
Morning, so sorry to hear about the surgery postponed...Love all your sweet animals, do enjoy the pictures you post on your Forest Haven, great blog.....yum, hot chocolate.....Blessings Francine.
k said…
Those kids are adorable! I think I'd love to spend an afternoon in your barnyard.

You are very inspiring. I think you accomplish more in a day even worn down with pain than most people do and you continue to be such a great caretaker for your animals.
Dewena Callis said…
Your Kevin sounds like a wise man. You listen to him and just focus on your body's needs and let him organize it all. And just tell yourself that next summer will be a whole different story, that you will then be able to do all these things you want to do so much. And in the recovery period just keep repeating that by fall you'll be feeling better, by the holidays even better.

Next spring you'll be frolicking as playfully as those sweet baby goats.
Mary Ann said…
Donna, first, congrats for keeping the pain meds up in your bloodstream and making you feel a little better. Hopefully they will carry you through to your surgery date.
The pictures were great, as usual.
If you have time, go read Kris at the Dancing Donkey, she had good comments on the weather we have all been having!
I'm really praying that this will have to be your last surgery.

The old folks knew how to survive on very little.

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